I sound like Rodney King, but I do wish we could find a way to get along. Or at least leave each other alone. I see so much anger in the world and the world reflects that state of being right back to us through wars, weather and disease. I learned a long time ago that issues must be dealt with or else they fester and grow worse and our world is expressing that illness.
I feel blessed, but some that know of my experiences might wonder why and may even suggest that cursed is more appropriate, however, I know I have been blessed. Perhaps it is simply a matter of perspective and seeing the good and learning from the bad, or maybe it is just a stubborn mindset I’ve adopted, but I am pleased to be me. I think that all my troubles, challenges and losses have given me a unique view of the world and an empathy with people. I like to understand patterns and although exhausting at times, I like to look at situations deeper than most.
All this is leading up to my latest confusion and perhaps confusion is too strong of a word, currently I am fascinated and disturbed by the absolute anger surrounding religion. And I wonder how we can merge the loving words of God, by whichever name we call Him, with the abject hatred of others who believe differently than us. It’s a mystery that has been considered by minds much greater than my own, but still I wonder. And frankly I don’t see any organized group rising above the hatred, only using it and manipulating others to follow along blindly.
I’ve always held a deep faith, a knowledge of something bigger and grander than me, a rhyme and a reason to events that could not be explained by mere happenstance and I find great strength in that knowing. I’ve never been a joiner of groups or church, for me, I don’t find God in a room filled with others, nor have I found my faith through following the words of others, my belief is quiet and maintained through spending time alone. But I recognize that all people are not me and each should have the right and ability to make their own connections with God in the manner that they see fit.
I see a lot of Christian bashing these days and it has become popular entertainment to mock Christians. Unless we go to a Christian college we are taught that Jesus was just another in a long line of Sun Gods, a continuation of pagan ideals and gods, so to believe in Christ bespeaks of an ignorance of history. But I understand that even the very educated can be ignorant and the more we attach ourselves and cling to ideas of organized and approved truths, the more ignorant we become.
I guess it is the lack of spirit I perceive in the world and in the words of our leaders that disturbs me the most. And sometimes I wonder if the belief that we are born equally endowed with a soul is an illusion. What if only a percentage of us born possess a soul and a connection to God? As spiritual beings having a human experience our soul and our spiritual life should be the most important focus, but for the majority of us living today, it is not. What if, like planting a seed and nurturing it, we must work to grow a soul?
In my way of thinking when we are in tune with our connection to the divine, we are not threatened by others pursuing their beliefs. And I think the thing that few of us understand is that faith and God is important, if it was not important, there would not be so much anger and chaos surrounding the idea. Some may say religion is only there to control the masses and I think there is truth in that statement, but the desire to connect comes from the inside and it is strong. It is more than instinct, it is almost like a thirst for those who experience the gnawing, it is not a fairy tale or an illusion, it is a truth all unto itself.
People seeking their connection through religion have never offended me, but using that religion to justify harming others is very offensive. Yes, many wars have been fought balanced on the head of religion, but God did not order those wars, men did and men are not God. I see a lot of people seeking others to prove to them that God exists, not understanding we can only prove it to ourselves, it is a choice, it is free will and it is time, sacrifice and energy, just like tilling the ground to plant a seed.